submitted by Kevin Sample, College Station, TX
Can we......DO that? What's taken so long, then?
"Get it fixed in 2006"
submitted and reviewed by Bruce Bezaire, Smyrna, TN
The same "it" from the Ebay commercials?
"ATM inside: Atonement, Truth, Mercy"
submitted by Jim Roach, St. Louis, MO
Bad theology. Atonement is not found inside of a church. It is available as a free gift of God. You may think I am being a stickler, but a little event called "The Reformation" came about over this very debate.
"Is anything to hard for God?"
submitted by Bruce Bezaire, Smyrna, TN
No. However, I am becoming increasingly convinced that proper grammar is "to" hard for His followers.
"Are you a light or a lampshade?"
submitted by Jennifer Bezaire, Smyrna, TN
Does anyone outside of the church even understand this metaphor? Non-believers who read some of this tripe must just think Christians are ridiculous sometimes.
"The key to heaven hung on a nail"
submitted by Jennifer Bezaire, Smyrna, TN
"Well done, thou good and faithful servant. You somehow knew that the key to heaven hung on a nail, whatever the heck We meant by that. Enter now into the joy of the Lord."
"Get right or get left."
submitted by Robert Adams
Old-school crummy! Let's make a pun about eternal damnation. It's fun!
Pop quiz for Christians (answers in italics) :
Explain what "get right" means in the context of this sign. (Stop sinning now.)
OK, what does "get left" mean in the context of this sign? (Don't go to heaven.)
What does one have to do with the other? (Nothing. At all. Read a Bible.)
"If your life is a TV commercial, what product are you selling?"
submitted by Kevin Sample, College Station, TX
It was easier for me to make a list of products that I am obviously NOT selling:
1. Rogaine.
2. MetRX weight gain supplements.
3. Armor All Car Wax.
4. Crest White Strips (.....my wife quipped. She's a hoot, that one!)
(This review probably meant nothing to my regular readers who don't know me personally. To the ones who do know me personally, it was probably pretty darn funny.)
I can hardly keep up with all of the submissions! Thanks to everyone for making this blog a success, and keep sending them in!!
Maybe its the section headings off the spine of an encyclopedia.
ReplyDelete"Is anything to hard for God?" asked the librarian?
"No, God asked for Israelites to promised land, and its out for repair after Moses finally returned it with the maps missing. Oh, and Jesus is requesting the water to wine volume."