submitted by new contributor Jayson WhelpleyThere's nothing funny about abuse, so I'll refrain from a wisecrack here (other than the post title).
My biggest question is: What the &$%# is the point of this sign?
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submitted by frequent contributor S. K. SuttonFaster than a speeding analogy! Able to leap tall metaphors in a single bound!
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"Missionaries are coming!"
submitted AND reviewed by frequent contributor Christine
One if by land, two if by sea.
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"He who throws dirt always loses."
submitted by Christine. Reviewed by her 9-year old.
What if you're in a mud-slinging contest?
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"Party in hell canceled due to fire."
submitted by frequent contributor Christine
You should see what it did to the ice sculptures we ordered.
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Christine recently went on vacation and sent me a wad of signs from her family's trip. I'll continue through those next week, beginning on Monday.
Also, there's some enormous news here at CCS that I'll announce Tuesday. Make sure you stop by! I may have taken care of all of your Christmas shopping for you already.
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Parties at humor-blogs.com are never canceled due to fire.
Keep 'em coming.
Sweet. I'm an officially published funny person. (ps the name is actually Jayson with a Y)
ReplyDeleteFixed. Sorry.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the submission!
If those missionaries would change position, they could get rid of that exclamation point.
ReplyDeleteI knew it! Jesus doesn't like Capitalism. Vindication!
ReplyDelete"and the pursuit of happiness scores on the rebound..."
ReplyDeleteI think that's "He who throws dirt always loses ground." Maybe it's written on the back.
ReplyDeleteThe spousal abuse sign is one of those great questions that cannot be answered right without it being implied that you DO beat your spouse. Aside from being sort of clever that way, I'm not sure what the point of that is.
The American dream one: I just find that intriguing. Of course, it's bad news to say "Jesus crushes your dreams."
It's called a complex question, I believe.
ReplyDeleteBut still, absolutely no idea what the point is.
"The" spouse. The thing you used to beat is now the thing you don't. Lordy.
ReplyDeleteI think it's "he who throws dirt always gets a tapeworm." So maybe the loses part means "loses weight."
rofl at all the snarking from the last few days. Oh how I enjoy it here in crummy land!
ReplyDeleteMaybe the spouses were street racing?
Missionaries? Coming? Seriously sexual innuendo doesn't fill the pews either..:)
ok, try as i might, that second one does not make a shred of sense to me. Jesus saves us from the American dream...implying the American dream is something we need to be saved from? have we been so blinded all these years?... ; P
ReplyDeletebtw, i'm waiting for tuesday... : )
-cassandra lynne