submitted/post title by frequent contributor Ryan GeerAnd for a limited time, we have new Jesus Brand (©) Dull Side Polish available for only $29.99 at this location only!!
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submitted AND reviewed by frequent contributor Ryan GeerThis must be the sequel to The Incredibles starring Jack-Jack.
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submitted by frequent contributor Ryan GeerYou will, however, still be able to find it in stockings hung by the chimney with care.
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"Jesus saves...passes to Moses...He shoots! He scores!"
submitted by new contributor JKelly, MN
Some churches should have to spend time in the penalty box.
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"Heaven is a lot like Dixie...only better"
submitted by Melissa in Alabama
True. There are none of these in heaven.
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Humor-blogs.com is a lot like Dixie. Only better.
Keep 'em coming.
If life seems jolly rotten
ReplyDeleteThere's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.
And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...
It would have to be better than Dixie.
ReplyDeleteAnd the Hail Mary three-pointer...nothing but net!
ReplyDeleteSeriously, that's some weird sign.
Of course Heaven is better than Dixie; it's better than anywhere.
ReplyDeleteBut what's with bad-mouthing the Southern Cross? Hundreds of thousands of Americans died under that Christian banner defending their homes and attempting to prevent the creation of the omnipotent federal government we enjoy today.
Gang:
ReplyDeleteWhoever put money on 5 hrs, 17 min. after the creation of this post we would have the first comment defending the Stars 'n Bars wins.
You may pick up your money at the front desk on your way out.
Saw your site from a link on Cousin Curtis' blog - funny.
ReplyDeletehttp://organizeddoodles.blogspot.com/
Joel,
ReplyDeleteSorry it took so long. :-)
Actually that's not the Stars and Bars, this is:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:CSA_FLAG_4.3.1861-21.5.1861.svg
General Beauregard commissioned the Southern Cross because the Stars and Bars was too similar to the Stars and Stripes in battle.
That's right, it's a well known fact that Jefferson Davis was opposed to Medicare AND the escalation of the Vietnam conflict. Neither of which would have been necessary if you'd have let us keep our damn slaves.
ReplyDeleteAlthough that's not at all what the war was about. It was about freedom. For white people.
Diesel, what you describe is one interpretation of the reason for secession. But remember, secession != war. Secession was the Southern idea, war the Northern one. The reason for the _war_ was demonstrably not slavery.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I messed up on the name of the flag. My bad on that.
ReplyDeleteBlame it on my Canadian High School education, which was remarkably short on information about the War of Northern Aggression, or the War of Southern Stubbornness, or whatever you want to call it.
Hey, don't be dissing Dixie. We're not all Alabama, you know.
ReplyDelete"that Christian banner"
ReplyDeleteI must've missed that day at religion school.
Jesus the Nazarene,
elder brother of James the Righteous,
didn't, doesn't and never will
care a fig about state's rights.
Les DuLunch: I live in Dixie (I think...technically). I love it here.
ReplyDeleteJust picking on parts of Dixie I could live without.
Well said, Mr. D.
ReplyDelete(as always)
Regardless of what you say Jesus does and doesn't care about, the cross on that flag still represents the Christian martyr St Andrew. It's descended from this flag:
ReplyDeletehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_of_Scotland
hmmm....Jesus passes, and Moses scores? interesting...
ReplyDeleteI knew that hockey sign had to come from my state without even looking at the source. I'm ashamed and embarrassed.
ReplyDeleteFirst off, as a native southerner I feel absolutely no need to defend the South's actions in the Civil War. Nor do I feel any need to display the flag of a rebellious populous who lost and a symbol of slavery to many people who live in this nation.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, I fully expected to see a trailer house in the link!
I don't mind the Dixie comments. I just like to put down Alabama.
ReplyDeleteBTW, Melissa, thanks alot. I've had Hank Jr. stuck in my head for two days now.
Yeah, as another native Southerner I have to agree I feel no need to defend that.
ReplyDeleteBut! I do think it's hilarious to watch other people do it. So march on little solider, however misguided you may be.
"march on little soldier" is the funniest thing I've read all day.
ReplyDeleteAnd I just noticed that xan used the '!=' comparison operator between secession and war. I'd make fun of you for being a Civil War geek AND a computer geek, but I have to admit the first time I read it, I didn't think anything of it. Sigh. This means I'm going to start dreaming in javascript again, doesn't it?
Rebellious population?
ReplyDelete"Obedience to lawful authority is the foundation of manly character." - General Lee
You native southerners would do well to consider the words of General Patrick Cleburne, and consider the source of your viewpoint:
"Surrender means that the history of this heroic struggle will be written by the enemy; that our youth will be trained by Northern school teachers; will learn from Northern school books their version of the War; will be impressed by all the influences of history and education to regard our gallant dead as traitors, and our maimed veterans as fit subjects for derision."
Yes, Diesel, I guess I'm a geek all over. If you come up with any neat Javascript code while dreaming please post it!
ReplyDeleteThat part about Southern kids being taught by Northerner teachers is just plain wrong.
ReplyDeleteI teach in Nashville, and I'm from the South.
South Canada, mind you, but the South nonetheless....
By the way, Diesel, I read your "Projectile Blogging" post when Joel linked to it. Priceless.
ReplyDeleteWell, Xan, I'm a native Southerner (Virginia was somewhat in the midst of things back then, if I recall), and I'm teaching the children of the yankees in Minnesota, so it's all evened out, eh?
ReplyDeleteAnd with all due Southern hospitality and gentility (which I'll admit these Yankees up here could learn, but they're too busy conserving body energy to avoid freezing to death), I completely and totally disagree with you.
Movin' on....
question: why does Jesus pass to moses?
ReplyDeleteI don't think there will be ANY flags, of ANY kind, in heaven.
ReplyDelete(Though I couldn't really say I agreed with xan's comment about the flag still being the symbol of St. Andrew. Using that logic, we'd have to say the swastika still stands for good luck.)
(And I dunno... but didn't Lee own slaves? I'm sure he was a very nice slave master...)
No flags in heaven, amen to that!
ReplyDelete