Guest Reviewer! Diesel from Mattress Police

A groundbreaking day at Crummy Church Signs....approximately once a month, I will ask one of my friends to guest review a batch of church signs. Just for a sort of "change of pace". We begin with the first guest reviewer: Diesel from Mattress Police. If you are not a regular reader of his blog, you need to be. Read on to see his take on some crumminess:

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Lately I've been pondering a change of direction in my life, so I've been asking for a sign to provide some guidance. Any kind of sign.


That's when I got an email from Joel. With lots of signs. Lots of crummy signs.

It was clear what I needed to to. But before I changed my email address, I decided to snarkilate those signs:

submitted by Duane B., VA

You mean the diffusion of confusion?

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submitted by Duane B., VA

...you worthless sack of #$%&@.
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"A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle"

But the safe money is still on hiding under a bushel.

"Atheists are beyond belief"
This sign is meant to give those of you on the edge a little push.


"God gives and forgives. Man gets and forgets."
submitted by frequent contributor Jennifer Bezaire, TN
Other than not specifying what God gives, whom he gives it to, whom he forgives, what he forgives them for, why He forgives them, what man gets, what he forgets, and why I should care, this is actually a pretty good sign.



"Need a new life? God accepts trade-ins."
submitted by Rev. Randall H., FL
Just don't expect full Bluebook value.

Well, I feel better. Joel, if you need to contact me in the future, my new email address is probertson@700club.com.

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A big thanks to Diesel, and be sure to make Mattress Police a regular stop on your blog visits.

Look for a new guest contributor in February, and look for some more crumminess tomorrow, as I already have some stored up...

As always, keep 'em coming.