"Free coffee. Eternal Life. Membership has its privileges."submitted by new contributor Danny M.
We listed them in order of importance.
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"If we don't talk you don't have a prayer. -God."submitted by new contributor Laura R.
"Seriously, Gabriel: If he doesn't call me soon, it's over between us!"
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"Seriously, Gabriel: If he doesn't call me soon, it's over between us!"
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"Conscience is a faults alarm. God is the battery."submitted by new contributor Laura R.
Of course, the battery is only there in case the real power goes out.
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"See the world's strongest redneck!"
submitted by frequent contributor Christine
This Sunday at St. Barnum and Bailey's Baptist Church!
That's one of those signs where there almost has to be a picture to even believe it exists.
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Last day to vote!!
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Of course, the battery is only there in case the real power goes out.
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"See the world's strongest redneck!"
submitted by frequent contributor Christine
This Sunday at St. Barnum and Bailey's Baptist Church!
That's one of those signs where there almost has to be a picture to even believe it exists.
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Last day to vote!!
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This post cross-posted on:
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So the mute population are all hellbound, I take it?
ReplyDeleteHey,I think that the free coffee idea is awesome. Starbucks/Church...they could put in a drive thru confessional. Order a Venti latte and absolved of your sins for free! Genius!
Can I get my Eternal Life with a venti Irish Breakfast tea, no creme, no sugar. Thanks. Oh and a cranberry scone too.
ReplyDelete"God is the battery."
ReplyDeleteAnd make sure you change your God every time you set your clock back for daylight-saving time.
God is like a dead battery. He has no potential.
ReplyDeleteNote: It just sounds like an insult. The theology is actually sound.
What is a "faults alarm?"
ReplyDeleteA false alarm? Is this an eggcorn?
I should emphasize that it's a poorly done malapropism, at that.
ReplyDeleteNot an Eggcorn, methinks, but a malapropism:
ReplyDeletehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malapropism
I suppose in some technical sense it may be a malapropism, but I always thought that term was used for occasions when the character/person didn't intend to use the wrong word - that is, it is due to ignorance of the language.
ReplyDeleteIn this case it just seems to be intended word play for the sake of the pun.
...yeah, because I go to church for puns.
World's Strongest Redneck - his real name is Steve McGranahan. I know him, he actually used to support my wife and I (we work with Campus Crusade).
ReplyDeleteHe has a great ministry (of that type) and definitely has a wonderful heart for the Lord (and a crazy testimony).
http://www.stevemcgranahan.com/
Faults alarm? I sure hope they don't live anywhere near the San Andreas False.
ReplyDeleteha! i'll take a double latte and a shot of salvation please!
ReplyDeleteGreat comments here! Thanks Jayson for the link to the Redneck!
ReplyDeleteMan, I hate it when God starts to go dead and my conscience chirps all night until I finally whack it with a broom handle.
ReplyDelete