Congrats, Tara! Send me your email and I'll get a book out to you! Oh, and here's your banner:
Second place went to Poke:
"And for the love of God, cover up your melons, Shiela!"
Third place went to Eric P.:
"Crushed by the negative reviews, "Exodus: The Musical" closed later that week."
I'll post another contest on Monday. In the meantime, to make up for yesterday's absence, some more crumminess:
------------------------------------------
"It is not the the length of life, but the depth of life. -R.W. Emerson"submitted by frequent contributor Chris H.
Look, all I wanna know is this: Does size matter or not?!?
------------------------------------------------------------------------
"God is like Alka Seltzer. Try Him, you'll like Him."submitted/originally posted by new contributor Alice
This sign gives me heartburn.
------------------------------------------------------------
"God is like Bounty. He is the quicker picker upper, can handle the tough jobs and He won't fall apart on you."
submitted/originally posted by new contributor Alice
And just when you need His help the most, you find out you're down to the last one?
--------------------------------------------------------------------
"Jesus is love?"submitted by new contributor Judith G.
We're not sure and we'd like your opinion.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
"If you're interested in flood insurance, ask Noah"
submitted/asst. reviewed by frequent contributor Allen's Brain
(Note: Must love animals. And ignore that rainbow)
Note: Allen says this sign was seen in an area with significant flooding recently. It's nice to know that in times of disaster, the church is there to make light of the situation.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
"When God first saw you, it was love at first sight."
submitted AND reviewed by this week's winner Tara
I caught His eye in the freezer section at the Piggly Wiggly.
----------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------
This post cross-posted on:
----------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------
Finally, I AM a winner! Thanks to everyone for making my dreams come true. You will never know the joy you've brought me.
ReplyDeletePuppies & Rainbows,
Tara
"God is like Alka Seltzer." Taking Communion must be quite an interesting experience at that church.
ReplyDeleteCongrats Tara!
ReplyDelete"God is like Alka Seltzer..." I can't believe I ate the whooole wafer.
Congrats, Tara! Everyone at my house voted for you -- including me!
ReplyDeletePlop! Plop! Fizz! Fizz! Oh what a relief HE is? That's just wrong (given that the ad writers were mimicking a bowel movement).
"It is not the the length of life, but the depth of life. -R.W. Emerson"
ReplyDeleteOkay, normally I would attempt something witty, but this just irks me.
Not everything that is true belongs on a sign. If you are not going through a crisis, it isn't going to matter what you read on a crummy church sign and if you are there are some things you don't want to read.
Say you just lost someone young in your family, like Steven Curtis Chapman. If your child precedes you in death, it may be true that in the final summary the only thing that matters is did he or she get to heaven. In the meantime though grieving the tragedy and learning to cope are very trying times and having quotes like this around just do not seem to helpful to me.
"(given that the ad writers were mimicking a bowel movement)"
ReplyDeleteGoodness... I HOPE your poops don't fizz when they hit the toilet! I think the jingle writers were talking about the sound the Alka-Seltzer makes when it goes into a glass of water. :)
"God is like Bounty"
ReplyDelete"God is like Alka Seltzer"
OSCAR: Your Majesty is like a big jam doughnut with cream on the top.
PRINCE: I beg your pardon?
.....
WHISTLER: ... Well, You Highness, what I meant was that, like a doughnut, um, your arrival gives us pleasure... and your departure only makes us hungry for more.
(Laughter)
Your Highness, you are also like a stream of bat's piss.
PRINCE: What?!?
WHISTLER: It was one of Wilde's. One of Wilde's.
OSCAR: It sodding was not! It was Shaw!
SHAW: I... I merely meant, Your Majesty, that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around is dark.
Monty Python's Oscar Wilde Sketch
I caught His eye in the freezer section at the Piggly Wiggly.
ReplyDeleteHaha
And I thought he shopped at Food Lion.
That 'Jesus Is Love' sign is in a yard down the block from the house I grew up in. I saw it every day for years and there was never a question mark. That "?" is a new addition. Strange, that.
ReplyDeleteDaniel, yes it's unfortunately been commonly mistranslated to read "Food Lion." But, in the original Greek, it's quite clear that the Son of Man should shop in the Piggly Wiggly. Their Kosher section is really quite delightful.
ReplyDelete"If you're interested in flood insurance, ask Noah" - you want to know something completely weird? My company actually purchased flood insurande from a guy named Noah. The guy couldn't have gone into a better profession.
ReplyDelete